Prayer for Peace - Part 1



I’ve been hiding from my shadow like it’s the boogie man.

Afraid to look at what’s been making me sad. Not wanting to look at what’s been bothering me.
Feeling not acknowledged. Blaming my partner has been a part of the projection/diversion.
Part of the other diversion from this feeling has been keeping myself very, very busy.
And not really taking the time to just look and be with myself.
So I did, I found some music and I just listened. I started to cry.

I found myself tearing up realizing I wasn’t trusting the process.
I was worrying about money because I knew that meant getting the support I needed at my birth,
from a Doulah or someone like that. But, what I actually wasn’t trusting was that the support would be
there for me. I also wasn’t trusting fully my partner to show up emotionally though I know he can and
in this space of relaxed knowing, I know he will.

I knew what I wanted but hadn’t yet vocalized it to those around me. I hadn’t yet asked for what I
wanted….and no wonder I felt anxious about it all.

I know I want a gentle birth for my baby. I want all the things I would have wanted for myself.
Dim lighting, hushed voices, space, warm water, mantra, support, love and grace.

I started to write my birth plan, it's quite detailed and taking shape and involves all these elements
which will make it a gentler birth.


’To be continued....

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